It feels like just yesterday that I saw you but yet It feels like I just lost you, it feels like I haven’t seen you in forever. It has been the longest saddest year of my life. July 12 is the nightmare I want to wake up from. It plays in my head over & over. I get hit with flashbacks of this nightmare constantly.
I think of you as soon as I awake & before I fall asleep at night. Always on my mind now & until the last breath I take. Some days have more tears than others. Always trying to numb the pain but it always returns in full force.
No amount of time will heal my broken heart. It’s a emptiness that will never go away. A loneliness that I wish I didn’t have. A missing piece of my heart & soul went with you when you left us.
I still talk to you & I try to contact you but still no signs of you in spirit form. I will never give up no matter if it drives me crazy.
A mothers bond is like no other. I carried you for 9 months & watched you grow into a beautiful young man.
I feel torn between heaven & earth. I am still needed here by your siblings, your boys Tori & the grandkids but I can’t wait to see you again. If I had the chance to visit you I don’t know if I could come back. Counting the days till we are all together again. Our family is broken with out you. Love you forever, love you for always. As long as I’m living my baby you’ll be.
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